We’ve had amazing dates. Deep talks. Passionate kisses. Lazy mornings in bed together where nothing in the world seemed to matter but the two of us
I wonder: Could you be “The One?” You certainly seems like husband material.
Still there’s one thing that’s bugging me…
I haven’t actually defined the relationship.
Are you my boyfriend? Am i exclusive?
You haven’t brought it up, so finally i decided to.
“I’ve been having such a great time with you,” i say with a mixture of nerves and excitement. “I was just wondering where you see our relationship headed…” .
I paused, thinking he’ll profess his love and dreams of a future with me, and instead he replies:
“We’re enjoying ourselves, let’s not ruin it by putting a label on it right now.”
He sees the look of utter confusion on my face, and clarifies:
“I’m sorry, I’m just not ready for a relationship.”
I felt blindsided. He seemed so into me. How could i have been so mistaken?
The truth is, he is into me but the thing is he’s just not into the idea of a commitment at this point in his life.
This scenerio looks familiar right?
I know this is incredibly frustrating, but stay with me here because I’m going to reveal a secret of the male mind that most women will never know:
Men have a mental blueprint for how they think their life is “supposed” to happen.
This blueprint controls everything they do: what job they get, where they live, how they spend their time, and when in their life they plan on settling down with the woman of their dreams.
Most women are different in this regard. Of course you have goals, dreams, and plans for the future, but you are open to change when the right man comes along.
Men, on the other hand, are extremely fixated on the blueprint they created long before you came into the picture.
This explains how a guy can meet an amazing woman like you at a time in his life when he thinks he should be single, and still sabotage it because his blueprint says the timing is wrong.
Here’s the good news… you can change his mind about commitment if you know how to change his blueprint.
But be warned: You cannot attempt to change his mind on a logical level. In fact, the more you try to convince him to commit, the more his instinct is to rebel – especially when it conflicts with his blueprint…
The secret to changing his mind is to make your man think that commitment is HIS idea, even though you are the one who planted it there.
Once you discover how to use the male approach to get commitment, you won’t need to do any convincing at all.
To be continued……
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